March 14, 2007 – What’s in a Name?

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Training classes and conference presentations tend to have bizarre names to attract people to them. They are like shiny objects to kids. I’ll admit, I am guilty of this. Some of the names for my articles and presentations include “The End of Fairy Tale Beginnings,” “Piñata Management” and “Avoiding Shock Therapy” (see Cuttings Edge Presentations). The term coined for these types of presentations is "Edu-tainment."

The list of classes that follows is from a 2005 Learning Center Programs catalog for a major company. The descriptions, however, are merely my guesses at what might be taught in such a class.

Embracing Chaos – This 6-hour course give you the structured tools necessary to truly define and order your chaos. Using the principals of the Chaos Theory this class will start bad and get worse.

Thriving on Chaos – Learn proven techniques to use chaos as a cover for you agenda and 10 steps to overpower co-workers.

Guiding Employees through Change and Survival Skills – Based on the hit TV series Survivor, your employees will learn how to lie, cheat, back stab and form alliance in an attempt to stay on the company island.

Bad Apples: How to Deal with Difficult Attitudes – Eight simple words to help your team deal: “I have a bad attitude. Deal with it.”

Between You and Me: Solving Conflict – For those students that need a remedial class or have failed the Bad Apples session. Students will be asked to step outside and supply their own bandages.

Making Your Point without Saying a Word – This business course includes sign language and facial expressions to express both sarcastic and derogatory comments.

Comfort Zones – Sponsored by La-Z-Boy furniture, students learn the ability to appear as if they are working while taking a nap at their desk.

Communicating With Your Manager – This advanced topics class focuses on speaking slower, using smaller words and drawing lots of pictures.

Dealing with Difficult People – 7 steps to becoming difficult yourself and forcing others to attend this class to deal with you.

Dealing with Different Personalities – Especially useful for those project managers that have multiple personalities.

I’m sure these classes offer exciting insights into their particular topic or the company wouldn’t have selected them. Admit it, you would be more likely to attend these than “Performance Appraisals and Basics of Interviewing,” right?